


Almost Free (Saiou Week: Domestic)

by Krbbftg



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Domestic, Killing Game Was A Virtual Reality Simulation (Dangan Ronpa), Kissing, M/M, PTSD, Post-Game, Saiou Week, bit of swearing, everything kinda works out in the end tho:)), kokichi struggles hiding his emotions after the killing game:((
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:26:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26227123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Krbbftg/pseuds/Krbbftg
Summary: Shuichi has been caring for Kokichi, who is dealing with a psychosomatic weakness and PTSD after the killing game. Discussing a plan to shut down Team Danganronpa and remembering all the awful things that happened, they find comfort in one another.
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 155
Collections: Welcome to Saiou week!





	Almost Free (Saiou Week: Domestic)

It was getting late. Kokichi cracked open the blinds, letting a foreign light from the streetlamp leak into the living room of the apartment. Shuichi should’ve been back by now. How long does it take just to grab a few groceries?

He widened the gap in the blinds with his left hand, chewing the nails on his right and glared down onto the cars and the littered streets of the people of the ‘outside world.’ The people who watched him lie and suffer and die; the people who enjoyed it. Fuck them. While a part of him was humoured by the idea of spending his time glaring down on them, as they had once probably gawked at him, this distraction from his anxiety was, of course, temporary. Crude thoughts began devouring his mind.

Where is Saihara-chan?

_What if someone recognised him?_

__**What if he decided to leave me and isn’t coming back?**__

A dizzying paranoia took over, melting him into an unstable state of dissociation; imaginary static, rain pattering the window and jangling keys rang from behind him.

Those ten minutes went by fast.

“...ma-kun.”

White noise faded out.

“Ou... kun...”

His vision slowly came into focus.

“Hey, Ouma-kun,” spoke a soft, firm voice. His body faintly jolted at the touch on his shoulder, which was when he realized the voice was real. “You’re really spaced out again... are you okay?”

He swivelled around, releasing his grip on the blinds, immediately noting bags huddled around the doorframe in the distance. Seeing Shuichi in front of him was more than a relief, but being able to see the concern through his transparent features sent Kokichi to regret being seen in such a pitiful state. He stared blankly into Shuichi’s eyes.

Shuichi spoke even softer. “Ouma-kun, can you talk to me?”

Finally a question he could answer. “Nishishi~! That’s a strange thing to ask, Saihara-chan! Although, you are looking particularly cute today, so it’s no wonder I’d be speechless.” Kokichi grabbed his hat, dancing it over to the coat pegs by the front door and continued, “you don’t need to wear the emo hat inside, silly.”

Shuichi watched in a fond, yet uneasy, silence as Kokichi clambered between the bags. He double-locked the door making sure to check through the peep hole, then spun around to flash the other boy a carefree grin, as if to repudiate the inch of vulnerability he just revealed.

Kokichi began dragging the lighter of the three bags to the spacious kitchen, leaving Shuichi the two heavier ones, and heaved it onto the counter. He leant his frail body against the kitchen island, watching Shuichi carefully unpack items into their respective places. “I know you probably want to help, but shouldn’t you get some rest? You looked like you were standing there for a while when I got back...”

“Hm? Standing where? Anyway, who said I wanted to help? And even if I did,” he picked at his fingernails and confidently said, “I’m a lot stronger than I was two days ago, so you have no place underestimating my power.”

Shuichi immediately put down the milk he was holding and held out his hands, palms down, in front of Kokichi. “Show me, then.” Kokichi stood up straight and faced him, placing his hands underneath Shuichi’s. He pushed up as hard as he could, arms, wrists and fingers twitching with strain, barely budging Shuichi’s.

“Just as I thought...” Shuichi sighed and nestled his fingers around Kokichi’s small, cold hands in silence. “You’re allowed to feel weak, Ouma-kun. Your body suffered a lot of trauma in there.” He stroked a thumb along Kokichi’s wrist. “I’d really like it if you rested on the couch a little longer.”

Kokichi knew that the more he lied, the more pity it brought on, so why did he still do it? More regret - he should’ve just gone back to the living room in the first place.

He curled up on the couch, lightly wrapping himself in a purple blanket for a while with the television on in the background. Eventually, he heard Shuichi begin to prepare food. He always made Kokichi eat something, whether he wanted to or not, so he took this time to psych himself up for it.

“Ouma-kun,” Shuichi spoke up from the kitchen, turning down the stove. “Can I ask your opinion on something?”

“Shoot.”

“Ah, one second...” he placed the lid on a pot and came through to the living room. He anxiously spoke, “uh, are you sure this is a good time?”

“Wellll, I’m waiting,” he affirmed.

He sat on the floor by the coffee table despite there being room on the couch. “Um, okay. So, I was talking to some of the others recently, I, uh... actually thought of something and,” he faltered, “how do I put this..?”

“Aw~! Are you gonna ask me to marry you!?” Kokichi joked, despite the bad feeling crawling up his spine.

“N-no, nothing like that!” Shuichi pulled his leg up to his chest. “I... really don’t know how to explain this or how you’re going to feel about it, but... to put it simply, I was thinking of... starting work.”

“...Work?” Kokichi was thrown off-guard. He sat up. “Like, a job? The earning money kind of work?”

Shuichi sent him a nervous look of affirmation, Kokichi returning it with a defensive glare. “And why should you do that? We have money.”

“Please, don’t jump to conclusions, just let me ex-!”

“No.” His shoulders began vaguely trembling from his tense grip on the blanket. Containing emotions wasn’t as easy as it used to be. “How are you supposed to work without showing your face? You know there’s creeps out there who’d treat you like some kind of celebrity if they recognised you, and that’s forgetting all the other psychos who’d pay to see you de-!”

“I know!” The television muffled the silence. “...I know, but I have to do this.” Shuichi dropped his leg to the floor, staring down at his hands. Barely audible, he mumbled, “my life will be useless if I can’t stop this for good...”

“Useless? Stopping...” Kokichi dug nails into his palms. “ I don’t even know what you’re talking about anymore, but I’m certain it’s a lie, Saihara-chan.”

“You’re not listening, Ouma-kun. It’s true!”

“It’s bullshit!” Kokichi exploded. “Listen to me, Saihara...”

“Ouma-kun, I’ve thought about it enough, I-!”

“Shut up already!” Kokichi’s face turned to blank stone, a faint watery glint in his eye. “Between you and me, I’m the useless one. I fucked up, everyone hates me and now you’re stuck taking care of me and my stupid emotional baggage. So don’t you dare even _think_ about using that word around me.” His voice scraped against his throat like a brick and a tear streaked down his cheek. “I killed _three people,_ Saihara...”

 __ Shuichi stood up, gently easing towards Kokichi. His words slathered with guilt, he condoled, “they forgave you, Ouma-kun. And you’re not useless, it’s okay!”

Two more tears dropped onto the blanket and he yelled, “It’s not fucking okay! I was disgusting.”

“This whole thing was disgusting.” He turned away, concentrating on the hints of streetlight glow through the cracks in the blinds. “Trust me, Ouma-kun, I’m just as mad about it as you are. Actually, that’s wrong, I’m seething.” Shuichi closed his eyes, revisiting the trauma in his mind’s eye - sending everyone to their deaths again. “They didn’t just toy with our lives. They messed with our bodies.” Holding back a waterfall, he pulled from his mouth, “they forced us to do disgusting things that I’ll never forgive. And it’s still happening to other people.”

He regained his composure. “I’m sorry. I haven’t explained myself very well... What I meant to say was, I think I can do something to stop this for good.” He decisively sat on the opposite side of the couch from Kokichi and made direct eye contact. “Can you see it? How we’re still caught in their trap. The reason we’re being paid isn’t because we gave up our lives, we’re-“

“-getting paid to keep our mouths shut, right?” Kokichi shakily wiped his eyes with his hoodie sleeve. “I... think I see where you’re going with this.”

Shuichi reached over and placed his hand on top of Kokichi’s, falling into deep thought. “If you think about it, there’s been over 800 people in the last 52 seasons and how Team DR run things is hardly accessible information, even now. We’ve all been getting paid to keep this info hidden, but if I can use my talent to earn money on the down-low...”

“So what you’re trying to say is, if you can save up enough money to survive without... _that company’s_ payments, you can speak up against them and take them down once and for all?”

“Exactly.”

“You... could’ve just said that to begin with.”

“You didn’t let me.”

Kokichi’s expression was wiped before animating himself again, “nii-hee! I guess you’re right. Momota-chan must be rubbing off on me, huh?”

  
  
He took a moment to contemplate. For Shuichi to show himself to the world, he must be confident about the idea; death threats from angry fans would become customary. Speaking out about the awful methods carried out by Team Danganronpa would equate to a massive corporation trying to shut him down.

It made Kokichi want to scream. He wanted to punch Shuichi for even thinking of putting his life on the line like that. It wasn’t his weak body stopping him, it was the fact that he’d be a hipocrit - he, quite literally, broke every bone in his body to end the killing game, not that it even worked...

The bottom line was, that even if there was just a small chance people would hear him out and Shuichi could stop that horrific show for good, being selfish wasn’t an option.

  
  
“...It’s a good plan, but it’s not finished. Leave it with me.” The words almost echoed in the room. Kokichi recollected the beginning of the conversation. “Saihara-chan?”

“Yes?”

“Just for the record, even if you decide not to go through with it, you’re not ‘useless’ to me or the others. You’re... not boring, either. And that’s the truth.” He gripped onto Shuichi’s hand harder. “I mean, you’ve been looking after me this whole time.” He scoffed, “well, even if it is just ‘cause nobody else wanted to.”

“That’s wrong, Ouma-kun, it’s because I want to take care of you. Look at me.” Gold met magenta. “I wasn’t lying when I said I loved you. That much won’t change, no matter how much you try and push me away.”

Kokichi’s heart tugged on itself. He wanted to say, ‘it will if you’re dead,’ but he knew that was the wrong answer. He felt small. Hiding it seemed impossible this time. “...can you hug me?”

Blood rushed to Shuichi’s neck. “H-huh? Are you sure? What about your claustrophobia?”

Kokichi dropped the blanket onto the floor and scooted over to Shuichi. “I... wanna get over it.” He wobbled into a straddle position, wrapped his arms behind Shuichi’s neck and rested his chin on his shoulder. Kokichi momentarily closed his eyes. He smelt of sweet coffee. Shuichi moved his arms, alerting Kokichi. “Wait-! Just... gently, okay?”

“O-of course...” Shuichi rested his hands on Kokichi’s waist. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” he said as his heart-rate quickened.

Shuichi slinked his hands around Kokichi’s back as cautiously as possible. Kokichi jolted and Shuichi retracted his grip. “Ah-! Sorry!”

_Cold pricks on his back, numb everywhere else. Dissolving organs. Unable to breathe, unable to move._ Kokichi’s upper body shot up and he dug a knuckle into his furrowed brow in attempt to ground himself from the flashback. He squeezed onto the material on Shuichi’s clothes and tried to keep control of his breath.

“I-I’m sorry, Ouma-kun.”

“It’s okay,” he gulped. “I asked for it, anyways.” He dropped his hand onto Shuichi’s chest. Struggling to find words, he started, “I... still don’t get why you...”

Shuichi sensed exactly what Kokichi was trying to say. “Because I trust you. Please believe me when I said I’ll stay by your side no matter what happens and I know you’d do the same for me.”

Kokichi’s expression darkened, his shoulders slouched. “...you shouldn’t trust a liar like me.”

He confidently responded, “it’s got nothing to do with lies.” He placed a hand back on Kokichi’s waist. “The point is, we’ve been through so many bad things together and I don’t care how long it takes because I want to spend some good times with you, and everyone else, too... because I love you, Ouma-kun.”

It could’ve lasted a lifetime, the way Kokichi’s eyes grazed every angle of Shuichi’s face before the moment was over; how Shuichi’s stare was stuck flitting between Kokichi’s eyes and appealing lips.

Enraptured, Kokichi’s hand drifted up and slicked under the collar of Shuichi’s shirt, caressing the side of his neck. Shuichi unwittingly leant into it and wetted his lips slightly. Kokichi eased himself forward inches away from Shuichi’s face, the edges of his mouth slightly curling up. This was everything he needed right now. His voice low and authentic, he said, “I love you too, Saihara-chan. I promise that’s not a lie.”

Kokichi crashed his lips into Shuichi’s like a tidal wave, sending a rush of heat to both boy’s faces and a feeling of ecstasy to the pits of their stomachs. Their lips brushed against each other with a delicate forcefulness, enveloping them in a comfort they craved. The hand that wasn’t on the side of Shuichi’s neck, Kokichi slipped from Shuichi’s chest, down his abdomen and-

Shuichi pulled away, “mmn, not yet! I forgot, I need to check on the food.”

Kokichi leant back. “Ugh, imagine getting cockblocked by rice! Let it burn.” He tangled his fingers in Shuichi’s hair, flirtingly bit his lip and whispered, “put ‘Saihara-chan’ on the menu and we can be done with it. Pleeeease?”

“Nice try,” Shuichi giggled and nudged him to the side so Kokichi lazily flopped onto the couch. Kokichi huffed as Shuichi got up and headed for the doorway. “Hey, Ouma-kun?” Shuichi’s eyes darted. “If you manage to clear your plate this time, ‘Saihara-chan’ just might be served for dessert.”

He hurriedly turned back to the kitchen, leaving Kokichi mildly speechless. Did Shuichi actually flirt? He was definitely braver. Or maybe Kokichi had just lost his edge? Either way, Kokichi’s face felt even hotter than when they were kissing.

A mumble slipped out of his lips. “Shit, I gotta finish all the food.”


End file.
